The Deadly Sins of the San Francisco Giants

Greed. One of the seven deadly sins. The punishment? Some say an eternity spent boiling in oil (expensive oil…but still).

The San Francisco Giants are apparently unconcerned about the eternal fates. How else to explain a greed so consuming that they would fight, scratch, and claw their way to a third World Series Championship in just five years, at the expense of a team of young, innocent heroes who’ve yet to taste the exquisite fruit of MLB championship even once?

To say nothing of long-suffering Royals fans: Mostly salt of the earth Midwesterners, the very backbone of this great nation – including many of the farmers who put food on the tables of San Francisco families! So much for City by the Bay gratitude.

And I’m not saying there was a strong sulphur smell in Kauffman Stadium when Madison Bumgarner emerged from the bullpen in the fifth inning. But I did note what appeared to be a couple of suspicious bumps protruding from the top of his cap at one point. And it seemed he may have cast some sort of spell on home plate umpire Jeff Nelson, who inexplicably began to call pitches half a foot off the plate as strikes (but not when Royals pitchers were on the mound).

Did the Giants not know about the elderly, and gravely ill Royals fans who were dreaming and pleading for victory? Or of Sung Woo Lee, the Korean Royals fan whose greatest joy was the prospect of a KC win? Did they not know about the brave Royals fan who — even after going into labor — wanted to stay at one of the WS games to cheer her boys in blue in spite of the pain of impending childbirth? (Talk about playing hurt!) Or did they know all these things, but simply didn’t care? Heartless. Ruthless. Monsters.

I personally don’t want to see anyone boiled in oil for all eternity. I’m a humanitarian that way. But I wouldn’t be asking to be buried in Giants gear if I was a SF fan…just in case.

I used to say that all I wanted before I die is one more Royals championship. I figured that left me safe for a few more decades. But near the end of this playoff run, I began to re-think: Maybe a three-peat?

So I guess when all is said and done, I’m no better than a Giants fan. I’m really just envious – another Deadly Sin. (Throw in sloth and gluttony, and I’m pretty much hosed.)

At least we Royals fans were able to experience the thrill of vanquishing three different opponents, ending their seasons in agony, before tasting the bitterness of defeat ourselves. So it was a pretty great run, all in all.

Congratulations to the Giants. They’re an excellent team, and deserved to win. At least our guys made ’em earn it. It was a great series.